Jun 25, 2009

Irritating habits that wreck a marriage

There are habits that should be avoided by couples to secure their marriage. There is also what we called a love bank to store the couples love feelings for each other. It is said that we are either making deposits or withdrawals in the account throughout each day. When things go well and we are loving, kind and supportive hundred of credits flow into our love bank and create the feeling that our partners are loved and accepted the way they are. When things go badly, huge withdrawals are made from the love bank. At times the account can be seriously overdrawn, and the relationship goes into serious deficit. When this withdrawal continues the couple can begin to hate each other and every action is considered a threat or interpreted as uncaring.

The habits that make frequent withdrawals from the couples’ love bank are stated here and this should be avoided by the couple to preserve their marriage or else their wedding vows will be broken. The first one is nagging. It means to torment by persistent faultfinding or complaining. This is the most common mistakes of a woman. A wife often complains about her husbands irritating behavior and wishes that he will change but the truth is the husband has a mind of his own. You can’t change him to be the perfect husband by nagging and complaining and the only thing you can do is accept his behavior and personality.

The second habit is angry outburst. This happens when our partner has done something that displeases us and we do this to punish or annoy them to get even. Some common mistake we make is shouting, put-downs, criticism or sarcastic name calling. Some couples resort to profanity, striking each other, throwing things, pushing, kicking and pulling hair. The third one is criticism, this is the worst part because you don’t only drain the love bank but you also drain your love one’s self esteem. If the person has done something that displeases us, an open talk is the key and understanding is what unlocks the door. We can hate the fault of our partner but we should never hate them and bear in mind that they are just human like us and prone to commit mistakes. There is always forgiveness and acceptance to keep the love flowing in the relationship.

The last one is irritating habits and annoying behavior. Some women marry a man and hope to change his annoying behavior while men marry their women and hope they will never change. There is some truth to this but husbands and wives should bear in mind that they should accept their partner including their annoying habits and focuses on their strengths and not on their weaknesses.

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Reminder to everyone:

English is my second language so bear with me if my grammar, as well as sentence and paragraph construction is faulty. I am not writing to impress but simply to express my thoughts.

The opinion written here is solely mine and I have no intention to impose it to anyone for that matter. So as the title goes this is just my perception